1. Learn to deal with the smell of dirty boots. Otherwise you might as well just quit right    now. Because no matter where you put them; in the cupboard, on the porch, outside the    back door… you will still smell them. There is no escape.

2. Accept that there will be more photos of the horse around the house than of anyone else.

3. Accept that the house will be untidy most of the time, because she needs to spend time  making her horse’s bed nice. Your carpet might be in desperate need of a clean, but you  can bet there won’t be a shaving or a wisp of straw out of place in that stable.

4. Know that once she arrives at the yard, time speeds up. Three hours at the yard feels  like five minutes. And yes, mucking out and one cup of tea really does take that long!

5. Weekends are not down time or quality couple time. They’re horse time.

6. As are evenings.

7. And any other spare waking moment!

8. NEVER make her choose between you and her horses. Not even as a joke. You won’t like  the answer.

9. No, those carrots are not for your Sunday roast. They’re for the horse! Anyway, what  Sunday roast? She’ll be busy riding!

10. Horse hair and bits of loose hay add to the character of your home.

11. Your wife hasn’t bought herself a pair of new shoes in years, but the horse has new  shoes every six weeks. That’s just the way it is.

12. Here is a valuable life lesson for you… You can fix everything with bailing twine!

13. Horses are like chocolates… you can’t just have one.

14. Whether it’s for her birthday, anniversary, Valentines day or Christmas… Learn where your local tack shop is. Every gift she wants is in there!

15. No, she doesn’t want to go camping in a tent, but yes, she’s happy to sleep on  the floor of a horsebox at an away show. It’s a totally different thing.

16. Never question whether or not riding is a sport. And if you dare voice that you think it’s easy, be prepared to put your money where your mouth is and be prepared for a whole world of pain in muscles you never even knew existed.

17. She hauls bales of straw and controls a half ton animal, daily. Try not to piss her off!

18. Your children will ride horses. Yes, even the boys. Just don’t even question it.

19. It’s going to be an education, because she’ll talk about her horse a lot and at first, you’ll  have no idea what she’s on about. But you’ll learn.

20. Get used to her car being like a mobile tack-room. You won’t change it, no matter how  many times you comment on the mess, grimace at the amount of mud or point out the  local car wash.

21. Forget the idea of having any spare money. What’s yours is hers and what’s hers is her  horse’s. So, in short, what’s yours is her horse’s, too.

22. The best thing you can do is to learn to love her horses as much as you love her.

 

Or, you could just follow the advice my other half gave, when I asked him for his input on this blog… “Don’t get involved with them!”

Charming.😉 Obviously, he’s totally kidding! He loves living with me, really!

I’d love to hear if you have any other advice for these long suffering men of ours.🙂

Specialist equine portrait photographer, blogger & vlogger. Essex based, travelling throughout the UK.